Page 8 - the Noise October 2017
P. 8

Straight out of File 13 from Steve Bannon’s recently vacated Washington office is the The second story of the proposed 1,989-mile 33-foot wide “Wall of Wal-Marts” is a
idea that would have “unified the nation” ... if only those crafty four-star generals hadn’t overtook the President’s Cabinet in the first 6 months of TrumpAmerica ...
Utilizing a partnership between the Walton Family (of Wal-Mart fortune), William Buffett (who bet his Berkshire Hathaway fortune on rescuing the BSNF Railway), and Elon Musk (who has a controlling interest in Solar City, among other technology companies), plus a “small fraction” of the US Treasury currently committed to US Military Operations Abroad, Americans could build a 3-for-1 that would satisfy the left, the right, and even those in between the spanning border of the United States and Mexico.
Humanitarian immigration of Mexican citizens is a contentious issue, especially in Arizona, as members of No Mas Muertes (No More Deaths), who provided food and water to border crossers for decades, were arrested near Arivaca in June. Realizing that demand to gain entry into the United States is bound entirely by economic reasons; a simple solution for this first crisis can avert the endless corresponding crises that needlessly result in “more tax dollars for more Sheriff Joes.”
Thus, the first line item of a comprehensive immigration overhaul is: #1 — to provide a safe crossing for citizens wishing to seek asylum in the United States.
To remedy, a three-story single-wide “way station dormitory” is envisioned, stitched together for the entire length of the 1,989-mile border. Immigrants would reside in a comfortable 16 x 33’ dormitory while employment and permanent housing is secured.
On the first floor, all shopping needs would be met by a retrofitted “Wall-Mart,” whose width would also be 16 feet, but whose aisles would stretch for miles, all connected by an airport terminal-style moving sidewalk — an “inter-department people-mover” — allowing “would-be citizens” quick access to a complete lineup of the store’s inventory, such as wonderful organic foods, colorful attire at rock-bottom prices, and playful new trinkets that can only be considered “fashionably American.” Last year’s campaign theme of “building a wall Mexico will pay for” is just shy of being a “capitalist’s dream come true;” if only the Waltons would kick in a few billion.
prototype for new HUD housing. Using environmentally-conscious materials, the agency would construct dormitories with Centros Ciudadanos (Citizen Centers) every 100 miles, where background checks would be performed, skill sets would be documented, employment would be verified, and housing would be secured. In addition, these Centers would provide “new citizen orientation,” a fast-track immersion course in US Customs and Municipal Law, ensuring “proper assimilation” and “productive longevity” as a “new citizen” in the United States. Running totally on solar power, the dormitories and Centers are standardized with state-of-the-art rainwater collection and greywater technology systems for hydroponic balcony farming; the built-in savings of food and power production will make this initiative a zero-expense item for future federal budgets, and provide immediate construction jobs for workers in border states.
The third story, intended as a partnership between BSNF Railway and public university engineering departments, would incorporate a prototypical magnetic rail system, with trains reaching speeds of 375+ miles per hour between quadrants of the Southern United States and Northern Mexico. Accommodating both passenger service and freight cargo, shipment times between the Eastern and Western seaboards would be slashed, and fossil fuel costs and consumption would be considerably reduced, leading to a reaping of divi- dends for not only stockholders in Berkshire Hathaway, but a residual infrastructural return for the American public.
Total estimated cost with private and public investment: $640 billion
(or John McCain’s proposed annual budget for the Military Industrial Complex next year)
As many in both countries are wont to echo:
Maldito eso generalísimos! (Dadgum those Generals!) Explotando ese dinero duro que les enviamos! (Always blowing up that hard-earned money we send them!)
8 • OCTOBER 2017 | the NOISE arts & news |

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